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Today, like every day, I am a fitness freak. I eat right, I exercise, and people say the results show. But I'm still not happy. I still feel ashamed when beach pictures are put up on Facebook. I refuse to believe my girlfriend when she tells me I'm attractive. I'm so damn self-conscious. I think it's because they called me ugly back in middle school. It's been 9 years, but I still can't get over it. My inner struggle MMT.

#16437 (7) - Jul 9, 2012 by nick - Miscellaneous - Yes, that made me think too! (343) - No, that made me sleepy. (79)


Comments

 

Although bullying is a serious matter, sometimes I want to roll my eyes and wonder why adults (you're in college or graduated by now, right) still care about dumb namecalling from a bunch of 11 year olds. You would look a lot different now even if you weren't health-conscious. Ugly is a funny insult from a bunch of pre-pubescents. This still counts as vanity. Talk to a therapist.

dont listen to horsefeathers. no one can you can completely understand or define the memories that shape or break you. and simply dismissing this as "vanity" does nothing but showcase horsefeather's vapid and very shallow misunderstanding of a potential iceberg of an issue. if this is still affecting you, then it obviously IS important, no matter what others may say. think about this instead, mate: it's good that you now live a healthy life style, but use that as a jumping point to sculpt a great future for yourself, rather than dwelling on the past. for instance, look at the progress you've made from a fitness standpoint, and take pride in that. learn to stop caring what others think, and learn to live for yourself. and if you cant divorce yourself from the opinions of others, then make sure those opinions come from those who matter, like your girlfriend or your loved ones! best wishes.

no one but you*

Once you see yourself one way, it's really hard to just break out of that. So, yes, name calling can have an impact long into your life, especially if it draws your eyes to something that creates an insecurity. For example, people call you fat and you are a bit chubby, you start to think of yourself as fat, you associate your body with being fat, and then even if you get skinny, you still have this very real association with your body and fat. It's real, it happens. Sometimes I wonder if people like horsefeathers would be able to look someone in the eye and say these things, seeing the suffering in their eyes and knowing that emotion is real or if he/she just enjoys having the power of saying snide things anonymously.

Being bullied isn't something that can easily be forgotten. When I was younger I was teased because I have scars from a minor skin disease all over my legs. Because of this, it took me until literally 2 days ago to wear shorts for the first time. It will take some time but you have to find your inner strength and believe that you are as beautiful on the outside as you are inside. You CAN overcome their harsh words. Just believe in yourself.

The only snide remark I do have for these other responses is no wonder you misinterpret my words, you're too invested in hating yourself, you're always thinking of yourself.

The only snide remark I have is that horsefeathers' head is too invested way up in the deep caverns of their vagisaurus rex. Too bad they're always thinking of trying to escape from the fleshy curtains of their cooch prison; maybe they could learn a thing or two about tolerance on this site. Then again, if I had to walk around all day with my face shoved up my own filthy snatch, I'd probably only have one thing on my mind, too.

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