Today, I woke up naked in his bed. I met him last night at a party. I can’t remember the end of the evening. But I remember saying “no.” MMT

Comments

there is never an excuse for a guy to do this. I am sorry that some guys are jerks and find myself apologizing for my gender way to much these days it seems.

I hope you do nothing less than press charges for date rape. On an aside, I see you are 19. Hon, you gotta be careful. It aint as fun to be the sober one, but, then again I've never found myself naked in some random person's bed. If you feel you were drugged please accept my apology for assuming you were drinking. It's still no excuse for the guy but you've got to be better to yourself. You've got to look at parties and other social situations and say, "is there anything, anybody at this party that could pose a threat to me?" Don't expect guys to respect you or your wishes especially if you meet them at a party. Let you in on a brain translation for men.... Hey, I think I'll go to this party tonight.....= I'm gonna go get some girl drunk and get laid tonight. It's sad hon, but, unfortunately it's true for 90% of them. Most that don't think that way don't frequent the parties. You're worth a hell of a lot more than any of those party guys could afford....Be good to yourself. :D

I just read your comment and burst into tears. I wish I could take your hand and help you through this because, well... me too.

i hate it when this happens, i remember beating the shit out of a guy who did this... we stopped him before he could get any further.... part of the reason i dont drink.

alcohol is such an unnecessary evil..............look for more 'cowboys' to take care of you. Real men dont need drinks to get in your jeans, and they also wont try to do it the first night they meet you.

Oh sweetheart..there are no words...that is not OK. You getting drunk does not mean it's OK to ...rape you...It is NOT your fault...This is rape, honey...Please don't stuff this down..please find someone older than you to tell. Even if it means going to your Doctor. (((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))

I was raped on my way home from a concert. I can't tell you how hard people tried to blame me. Was I drinking? (No.) Was I provocatively dressed? (No.) Did I flirt with him? (No.) Did you fight back? (Of course!) And so on. The judgment is already there, even from those who have half-heartedly apologized. So what if you drank? I'm sure he was drinking too. I'm sure everyone else was. My point is, there is no excuse for rape. I did everything "right" and was still violated. It doesn't matter if the victim should have acted differently, since none of that is guaranteed to prevent rape. HE should have acted differently. It was all on him. Please, tell your best friend, not the internet. Find a therapist. Go to the police or find a bigger friend to beat the shit out of him. You can cry, you can scream, you can buy a switchblade, you can immerse yourself in school as a distraction, you can tell yourself it's okay not to date for awhile. I'm sorry this happened to you. I'm sorry this happens to anyone. But please, don't hide behind your monitor.

I know way too well how you feel. Only in my case, it was someone who was supposed to love me. You have to press charges though so that he doesn't get away with it and think it's ok to do the same thing to other girls. Never ever for one second think this is your fault. It's not. And if you need someone to talk to, I can offer an ear.

oh god, i am so sorry. please, please tell someone else about this. this is rape, and it's awful. feel better, sweetie.

take him to court darling. even if you think it isn't a case you can win. there is no excuse for rape. none. natural justice exists i hope you come out stronger because of this. xx

you too will find strength as i have for i am a victim as well i send you lots of loving energy .... its not your fault

This happened to me once and I didn't say anything to anyone. I felt dirty and used and blamed myself. It changed my whole perspective of relationships and sex. Before this guy I had only had one partner, my high school sweet heart of 4 years. After this happened, I had 10 partners in a year. It devalued my self worth. A year later I'm finally moving on with the help of my closest friends. Get help now before it consumes you! It doesn't matter how wasted you were (my rapist fed me drink after drink with god knows what in it) It is not a free pass for someone to violate you!

I'm sorry to hear that this happened to you, me too. I didn't want to tell anyone at first, and what made it even worse when I told my (then) best friend she told me her ex-boyfriend had done it to her too. You're not the only one out there and you have a choice if you feel strong enough to maybe save another from this.

"Real men dont need drinks to get in your jeans" ^ i completely agree. that was a disgusting lowlife who did this to you i really hope that nothing lasting comes out of this. stay strong!! :)

what is wrong with people?

Don't let people blame you and don't blame yourself. There is no excuse for what was done to you. This is never okay, not if you were drunk, on drugs, wearing provocative clothing. Hell, even if you were running around naked at that party, it's not alright. No means No. Be strong, because you will get through this.

I was raped too. I think about him every day. I wish I knew how to make you feel better. Just don't lock yourself away. Please talk to me; rakel.steinunn@hotmail.com

Has anyone noticed girls don't rape guys?

No, I don't think it should be on fml #19. Sometimes the comments can just be way out there and rude. Kate 19, I am so sorry, I have a friend who was raped and burned because wanted to "Brand" her as his, please tell someone. Don't be alone, its not worth it at all. I'm begging you please please please tell someone! You have no idea how much it helps! Praying for you. I'm here if you need to talk.

Guys get raped too MightyMaddy and sometimes by women.

I'm so sorry-I hope you went to the hospital and filed a report. It's not your fault

It's people like him that need to go to hell. I don't care if he donates money every other day. Kate19, no matter how bad it seems now, it will get better. Just know that there are people everywhere that love you and will be there for you, including all of us commenting here. Don't ever, under ANY circumstances, blame yourself; that man doesn't deserve anyone like you! (((((((((((((((((((hugggggg))))))))))))))))))))))))))

@ shakingmyhead The law clearly states that if "the defendant "knew or reasonably should have known that the complainant's condition rendered her incapable of consenting." " (http://www.uslaw.com/library/Massachusetts/Rape_Intoxication_Consent.php?item=46814). If she were drunk (and I'm not implying she was) and said yes (even after saying no), the rapist would be aware of her condition and would know she was not able to make a coherent, and lucid decision. So, in playing the "devil's advocate" you're actually saying that it might have been her fault? I too am a strong advocate AGAINST rape, seeing as I was born as a result of it and you, my fellow commenter, sicken me.

"the defendant........consenting," * he is guilty of rape.

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